Pre-Op

I don’t know why this is posted sideways, but here is Seth in pre-op.

Christmas Cards

In the fifteen year history of our marriage, Karla and I have probably sent out 1 Christmas letter and Christmas cards twice. We just don’t seem to get the whole thing. First, there is the Christmas letter that involves most people sharing the “successes” of the year. One isn’t bad, but when you get 25-30 a year it seems like everyone is bragging about why their lives should be written down on paper and sent to all their friends and family. Once we got a letter written from the family dog’s perspective.

Secretly Karla and I long to read the letter that says, “Our marriage is tough, our kids are bad, and our dog has very smelly gas. And, oh yeah, Merry Christmas.” Unfortunately, it never comes. So, needless to say, we never send out Christmas letters, because we are horrible liars. Our lives are like everyone else’s–hard to sum up in an optimistic paragraph.

The second reason for not sending cards is that we are lazy. It seems we procrastinate until the last minute and then never get it done. In fact, one of the years that we sent Christmas cards was actually the writings of the year before. We waited too long and sent them the next year. Pathetic. The idea of tracking down addresses, writing notes, figuring out who they go to and who doesn’t get one, stamping them, licking the envelop is all so exhausting. So we end up not doing it. Jim Gaffigan says cards are funny because you read it and say, “Yeah, that sounds like something I’d say.” With Christmas cards it is easy…Merry Christmas. We just can’t seem to get it done, though.

But not this year!

Karla and I (at my prompting and her submission) decided to send out Christmas cards. And you know what? It was just as exhausting as I thought it would be. So, for all of you who got one, consider it a true gift. A collector’s item if you will. And for those of you who didn’t get one, click the link below and recieve the love and effort of a very lazy Christmas couple.

The Barker Christmas Card:

“Our marriage is tough, our kids are a challenge, our house is falling apart. And, oh yeah, Merry Christmas!”

CLICK HERE

Got Spirit? Let’s Hear It!

One thing I love about Grace is her school spirit. She always participates in the school themed days (jersey day, black and orange day, etc.). Today Grace participated in Crazy Hair Day. She loves this sort of thing. She frizzed out her hair and sprayed her entire head orange and purple. It was her craziest hair to date.

As she was headed out to the bus stop, she saw another bus with kids in it. As she looked inside the windows of the passing bus, she saw lots of kids, none of whom had their hair crazy. She ran inside and yelled, “Mom! Check the calendar! Is today Crazy Hair Day?” To which Karla said, “NO!” Grace, holding back the tears, ran to the sink and had me wash out he hair in 90 seconds before the bus came–a social catastrophe avoided. Good thing it wasn’t Wear Your Pajamas to School Day.

Full of Grace…

I remember when I found out that I was going to have a baby. I just got back from a mission trip to Mexico and Karla took me out to Famous Dave’s and told me the awesome news.

I remember when we found out our baby was going to be a girl. I was in Belize and I made a very expensive phone call from My Refuge radio station in Belmopan. Karla told be it was going to be a girl. I said, “you’re joking.”

I remember how much Grace loved to sleep on my chest.

I remember one Sunday before church, Grace puked all over me.

I remember at Snow Business, our high school winter retreat, Grace was held by every student on the retreat.

I remember Grace having a hard time leaving Disney on Ice. “NO DADDY!”

I remember that when Grace learned to ride a bike, she tricked me into thinking she needed my help and then rode off with me running furiously behind her.

I remember Grace’s first birthday. She could talk and eat cake. Come to think of it. I remember them all so clearly.

I remember moving to Des Moines. Grace said, “This is not my church.”

I remember walking Grace to school.

I remember holding her soft hand.

I remember wrestling with her and knocking her tooth out. We kept wrestling.

I remember when Grace would eat anything for money.

I remember watching Grace in a concert, thinking “are the other parents as proud as I am?”

I remember how afraid she was last night.

I remember everything. Happy Birthday Grace!

Tags: Thoughts

Whoopie!

So, this Halloween Seth wanted to be something different. He has been Spiderman for the last two trick or treats, so he was looking to expand his repertoire. He and Karla decided on a whoopie cushion. A little back story here would help you.

Since Seth was in preschool, he and Karla would spend their lunch times together talking about bodily functions. Seth is fascinated with toots, bowel movements and private parts. We think this may have something to do with taking him to Grossology at the Children’s Museum. I knew nothing of this until I was starting Westwind Church. I would eat lunch at home and be subject to Seth and Karla discussing the disgusting. I was amazed at how easily the talked about cultures lunch-time taboos.

Needless to say, it was an easy pitch for Karla to get Seth to be a whoopie cushion. Once Seth knew he could walk about school making tooting noises, he was sold. Karla made the entire outfit, and Seth and she got all the attention they desired. It will be interesting to see what he wants to be next year. There is talk about a loaf of ….

Stay At Home Dad

This summer I got to test my parenting skills by being home half time while Karla worked. It was a new experience for me, one I treasured. This week will be the final exam as I stay home with the kids while Karla heads out to MI to help her grandma move into an assisted living complex.

I will not even come close to doing the same amazing job as Karla does being a stay-at-home mom, however, I will do my best. Plus, I have called my parents and they are taking them for the weekend. Now that’s just good parenting!

Barker Bus Stop

Recently, we found out that our school was being remodeled, and that it would be out of commission for a year. That meant that Grace ans Seth would have to take a bus to another school for this school year. More importantly, because of student safety, all kindergartners will be picked up in front of our house. Grace reaps the benefit of this, too since she is related to the young student. Our kids are now being chauffeured to school every day.

The Last of the Summer Fun

Last week of summer. Karla and the kids had a little fun at the lake. Here are some pictures.

CLICK HERE